Weekend and days – joy and detachment

Friday was a strange day, as my employment ended.  I had a very optimistic interview in another department,but as all things there is no guarantee.  I have spent the first couple days of this week in a strange languor.  Hoping to hear more about that position.  I am hopeful but fear it is for nothing.

Saturday night I met with my dear Zed and we both joined a couple of his friends for dinner.  It was an adequate repast, though cost more than I would have liked to have spent. We then went and saw an amazing comedy show, followed up by a brief bar hopping jaunt in celebration of one of Zed’s friends marriage. It was a lovely evening, made all the lovelier by falling into dreams in the arms of my love.

Sunday I spent a good portion of the day with Zed. We had a silly breakfast of burgers, fries and milk shakes. Watched some t.v. and napped together sweetly.  It was hard to return to my own home.  Since we have gamed with each other Sunday and Monday night, which I have enjoyed very much.

I need to work at keeping my head about this, I accept that I am in love, but must protect that love from my impulsiveness.

I am a bit detached over a day spent at home. I have managed to be active both Monday and today though.  I will do my best to continue to care for my stability and nurture my relationship with Zed.

Thursday Night Concert

Last night I went with Zed and his friends to a show.  I picked him up from work and he made me dinner; which was pretty damn cool. It was simple fair but both filling and tasty. We met a few of his friends at a pub before the show and had a couple drinks.

It wasn’t completely my taste in music, but still very enjoyable. Best of all was spending time with Zed whose joy in turn fills me with joy.

It was sold out and the crowd was massive, which kicked my anxiety into overdrive. So I had my usual coping mechanisms in place, ear plugs and eyes mostly closed or looking down. I have to limit the visual input in these situations or risk being completely overloaded.  Quite often I would feel Zed’s hands resting on my  shoulders or slip round my waist. Without being really consciously aware of it, he grounded and buffered me from the sensory onslaught. It felt so good to be comforted that way.

All in all a good night out, which was especially nice considering the stress of this week.